5 Ways to Change The Dynamics of Your Relationships with Friends... So You All Can Win.
What do I mean by changing the dynamics of your relationships with friends? When [you] decide to start something fresh and new, rather it be going back to school to gain that degree you've always been putting off, or starting that business idea that you've been holding on to for years now or maybe you decided to go ahead and begin to take your health more serious and decide to actually use that gym membership you've had now for 6 months. I'm not judging. lol What ever it is that you decided is important to you to want to begin to take more serious, let's be honest... all of your friends may not be on board for your new change.
Why? Because when you begin to change it puts the pressure on your friends to either level up or lose a friend.These kinds of changes can add a weight to what you are already trying to learn and establish. Your friends are use to being able to access you whenever they want and because you are a good friend or don't have anything else to do, you have been entertaining everything that will keep you distracted from accomplishing your goals. You're wasting time enjoying your time with nothing to show for it. Your friends have become codependent on you to make them feel better or to vent their pinned up frustrations. I'm not saying you can't be there for your friends. I'm saying nothing from nothing leaves nothing. If you have a cellphone and it dies and you have your laptop with you and it dies too. Just because you have your usb cord to connect your phone to your laptop does not mean it will begin to charge your cellphone. Both systems are down and in order for your phone to charge your laptop has to get connected to an energy source and be left alone for some time to be an effective source of energy for the cellphone... And so do you !! If you want to truly help your friends you have to first help yourself.
So how do I change the dynamics of my relationships?
Plan out your days and weeks. When you know what you are doing, you know what you have time for and what you don't have time for.
Set boundaries. People respect you more when they know you are serious about you and they can not access you as easily as they once could. They will respect your time and/or find another source for their needs.
Be honest with your friends and let them know that you are working on bettering yourself. Get them motivated to want to do the same. Some friends may not jump on board that quickly because they want to see if you are really making improvements or just talking about it.
Change the topics of the discussions. Instead of venting on what's going wrong, start to celebrate what is going well. Small accomplishments are still accomplishments that will get you closer to your goals.
Be genuinely happy to support your friends and cheer them on. Even if you don't get the same praise right away be motivated that you can and will win too if you stay focused.
Get started today, Be Brave and take that first step!
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Truth is you are either the person breaking out of the old routines or the friend of the person deciding to start fresh and if you're the friend, then you can do it to. You just have to stop overwhelming yourself with thoughts of what's going wrong and what you don't have time for. Make the time to invest in yourself NOW because when you procrastinate it only takes that much longer. We live in a world of abundance so never feel like you have to compete with someone to win. Stay focused and in your lane of what you like to do so that when you have conversations with your friends you can discuss how you all are pushing through and winning!!
Be Blessed and Trust God above ANYTHING else!!
Trust in the Lord with all your heart, And lean not on your own understanding: In all your ways acknowledge Him, And He shall direct your paths.
Proverbs 3:5-6
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